As your due date nears, the reality of impending parenthood can be both exciting and overwhelming. You may be getting nervous or have anxiety around when you’ll go into labor. You may be stressing about getting the nursery ready or finalizing details for your maternity leave. That’s why planning and enjoying a big night out can provide a special opportunity to unwind, connect, and relish your partner’s company before your baby’s arrival takes center stage. I always encourage clients to schedule a “no holds barred” date night around 37 or 38 weeks - it’s a chance to take a deep breath, enjoy some quality time together, and remind yourselves why you’re a great team. Orange County offers an array of high-end, memorable spots to make this final pre-baby date night one for the books.
In the quiet hush of the labor & delivery room, where the air is charged with anticipation and the scent of earthiness and birthyness, a new chapter in your life unfolds. The rhythmic cadence of your breath is mirrored by the gentle whispers of your doula, a reassuring presence in this oh so sacred moment. The culmination of nine months… maybe more, leads to this: the first hour with your newborn.
When I was selecting items for my baby registry, it was really important to me to not go overboard. As a doula of 14 years, I’ve seen families get overwhelmed with the amount of stuff in their homes and nurseries and I knew I wanted to keep things on the simpler side. I also wanted to be mindful of the impact on not only the environment, but also my baby’s microbiome - which meant finding a lot of eco-friendly products to keep waste down and keep our home as “low tox” as possible. Here you’ll find some of my favorite sustainable and most useful items that I registered for.
In the quiet hush of the labor & delivery room, where the air is charged with anticipation and the scent of earthiness and birthyness, a new chapter in your life unfolds. The rhythmic cadence of your breath is mirrored by the gentle whispers of your doula, a reassuring presence in this oh so sacred moment. The culmination of nine months… maybe more, leads to this: the first hour with your newborn.
As a dad, oftentimes the reality of having a baby doesn't set in until they're born. Even then, bonding can take a while and this new role of fatherhood can feel oh, so intimidating. We get it and it's completely normal. You didn't carry, birth or nurse your baby and it all feels abstract.
One of my favorite parts of being a Postpartum Doula is to help dads grow closer to their babies and watch their confidence soar.
Pick your favorite books, hold your baby in your lap and read, read, read. Not only does reading to your baby help encourage early language development, but she will love listening to the unique tone and natural rhythm of your voice. If you have a hard time with basic board books, try pulling out your favorite PG chapter book to read aloud. Baby doesn’t care too much about the content, they care about connection.
Bath time is a perfect way to introduce a simple routine that can be just for you and baby. Whether it’s every night before bed or every other day, you will gain confidence as you care for your little one and ensure a special time carved out to enjoy being a dad.
Physical touch is so very important for brain development and emotional security. By introducing a basic massage routine to your week, the bonding hormone, oxytocin will be flowing in both baby and dad. The release of this hormone creates a strong attachment and actually increases your desire to be present and close with those you love.
Diaper changes. It’s a mundane occurrence that happens way too often, right? A baby needs 8-12+ diaper changes a day, which leaves SO many opportunities to connect with your baby while they’re usually awake. I like to encourage fathers to utilize this time making eye contact with their baby and sing a song. Before you know it, it will be the favorite part of your day.
Play is the foundation for early childhood. Get down on the floor and play with your baby. Make silly faces, shake a rattle, tickle their toes and imitate their sounds. You have many more years of play ahead of you, so start now by building a strong attachment rooted in joy.
We promise this idea wasn’t just started by new moms waiting for their 6 week clearance. Multiple studies show that holding your baby skin-to-skin while feeding them, increases bonding, regulates baby’s temperature and encourages baby to be accustomed to your scent. Simply get your little one in a diaper only, cradle them upright in the nook of your arm, make eye contact and feed your baby.
There’s nothing like watching a new dad beam with pride as he calms his crying baby. From the football hold to bouncing on the yoga ball, to swaddling and shhhhhhhhing; a postpartum doula will help you practice each and every soothing technique for your fussy newborn!
The desire to be held spans across every age and starts from the moment you’re born. Babies are often go from rocker, to swing, to crib to tummy time and crave to touch from those they love. You don’t need to hold your baby all day long to create a strong bond. Plop your baby in your arms while catching up on the morning paper or snuggle during the basketball game. As a postpartum doula, I teach all dads how to use a baby-carrier to be able to get some baby snuggles in while still having both hands free!
In a world that is constantly on the go, bonding with other humans is often the last thing our minds. True, intimate connections have been replaced by social media and surface level relationships It somehow seems easier and safer that way.
But, is safe and easy best? Should we avoid connection and bonding because it's inconvenient? Not at all. Humanity needs true connection now more than ever. Adults and children alike are designed to need healthy attachment - it's a part of our DNA. It begins with pregnancy and continues to birth, childhood, marriage and beyond. Simply put, bonding is essential for our survival.
Woohoooo! You've made it to the third trimester and the reality that your baby is arriving soon has probably hit you like a ton of bricks! If you're like most of our clients, you want to be as prepared as possible for your birth and this means getting your hospital bag packed and organized by 36 or 37 weeks. If you're feeling a bit overwhelmed by this task - we’ve created an easy, but comprehensive list to make it easier on you. Having your bag packed and ready to go will help you feel more at ease as you enter these last few weeks of pregnancy and prepare to meet your sweet baby!
These are the things you shouldn't skip! Even if this is the bare minimum that you pack - don't forget these items!
Prescription Medications
Toiletry Items: Face wash, moisturizer, tooth brush, shampoo, conditioner, body wash, contact solution, etc. (They do not have most of these items at the hospital so definitely bring your own!)
Glasses (if you're a contact-lense wearer)
Slippers (we recommend throwing them away after)
Comfortable clothing: if you're not interested in wearing a hospital gown for birth or postpartum then make sure you have clothing that allows for easy access to your belly and your nether-regions.
Chapstick or lip moisturizer
Hair ties
Outfit to wear home: non-restrictive clothing is best!
1 or 2 extra pillows (covered in old or dark pillow cases that can be tossed afterwards)
Cell phone/Tablet chargers
Nursing tanks & bras
Ear plugs & eye mask (helpful for those that need a little extra help to fall asleep!)
Several copies of your birth/baby care plan
Photo ID and insurance card
Snacks for you and your partner! (grab our free printable for packing labor snacks here!)
These are great options to have for comfort in labor.
Blue Tooth speaker
Pre-prepped play lists (we recommend creating several - some with upbeat songs to energize you, others with relaxing sounds and no lyrics to help you focus)
Fitness Ball (some hospitals have these, but they may not always be available or be the right size. When in doubt, it's helpful to bring your own).
Essential Oils for labor
Rebozo or a long scarf
Christmas lights (read more about why here)
We haven't forgotten about your awesome partner! The following is helpful to have on hand to make their experience enjoyable!
Snacks!! (we take eating seriously, don't forget food!)
Hydrating beverages
Personal toiletries
Comfy clothing
Breath mints or gum
Comfy shoes
Text/Call/Email list to announce the birth
Extra layers (hospitals get cold then hot then cold again - dress in layers!)
Phone/Tablet charger
Treats for the nurses (protein bars, cookies, chocolate, etc. are all big hits!)
Your little one doesn't need much and the hospital has most of it especially diapers, wipes and swaddles! Many of these items are optional.
Cloth diapers/wipes (if you're choosing to use cloth, you'll need approximately 10-12 diapers per day to be safe). Don't forget your wet bag for storage!
Soft swaddles
Going home outfit
Socks
Onesies (2)
Infant car seat
We hope this list is helpful as you get ready for your baby's birth day! Is there a "must-have" that we missed? We'd love to hear from you! Share your ideas in the comments!
Hey there, mama. We see you.
We see you with your sore nipples trying to get your baby to latch, scrolling through KellyMom trying to figure out what's going on and how to make it work. We know it's hard and painful and exhausting. They told you your baby would feed every 2-3 hours, but how has it only been 45 minutes since your baby last fed and is now showing signs of hunger again?! Yeah, we see you.
